The reason why you're getting stupid smart-ass answers here is that there is no super 'magic bullet' to lose weight and gain muscle. Just do some exercise. Adjust calories appropriately, and get enough protein. The only 'secret' here is good old fashioned hard work.
Here are some websites I'd recommend: The FAQ:
http://www.trygve.com/mfw_faq.html Krista's website:
http://www.stumptuous.com/